For Whom do we Mourn...???

I am really deeply hollow in my mind with the death of that girl. Heavy in my mind, now my real question is "FOR WHOM DO WE MOURN?" Is it for that girl, or for other ones who are dying by mind and body day by day.

YOUNGSTERS NO ANYONE DESPITE OF THEIR AGE DON'T WANT TO DO SOMETHING FRUITFUL IN LIFE.

The demon called "Lust/Sex" is bounded them. Earlier there will be inhibitions while boys and girls talk about these things. In recent days, even for asking a copy of pornographic film to male friends girls don't hesitate. Fathers and Brothers sexually assaulting their daughter and sisters is in row. This is the dawn of the dusk. The darkness started prevailing all over. When are we going to understand we are the reason for this. No one rule or one political control is going to control this.We are not knowing one or other day it is going to ruin ourselves.

Now I can understand why Jesus said to everybody "REPENT FROM YOUR OWN SINS", is that not I am calling as Fundamental Change?

It's not just my view....Everybody says it....

We need a Fundamental Change.....

Analyzing a series of questions which pondered around my mind after the "Delhi" Gang-rape case, again I got the answer, that as humans - a social animal, we need a fundamental change to move away from our animal instincts. We have to stop playing the blame game - he is doing/she is doing wrong. Every silly individual has his own part in this, including myself. Lets change fundamentally - else our future generation will be at stake. It is all about how we love our parents - a happy family. This won't be there if we don't act today. Youngsters need to take action. Getting Fun with girls is not the actual life, there is lot more. Think about what I say yourself and it is all in your hands to live in a peaceful world.

Sex is not the only problem. All lustrous activities. But this one is gigantic. FUN IS ALL UPTO WE ENJOY THAT BEAUTY. WHEN IT DETERIORATES. think about the truth.....

I have spoken about this current issue only. But there is much more.....

Truly I knew it that they will deny me......

At times when I use to think about my past years and the people I lost, I can remember about people whom I strongly believed, trusted. Even I had people who said to me "I will be with you forever. You are showing good path to me", "I will come with you wherever you go". I am not saying I am a big prophet or Son of Man - Christ. But when I am used to these sentences, especially from the beloved people whom I really believed like anything. The persons whom I thought will carry messages which the almighty wants to pass through me, I really heard real stories of "BETRAYAL", they are betraying me. "I never knew that man", "He is one great Humbug", the last few days also was something like that.

I use to spend hours and hours with people whom I will think God has sent for my help and in turn I am helping them with all what I had. Every man is not perfect including myself. God will help me guide them in the right path. But one or other day I will loose them from my sight. Later I will be hearing something like "They spoke against me" or betrayed with some wrong condemnation  on me.

I use to think of these scenes. Once I also had 12 people with me. I am not the great savior again. But I talk about the similarities which heal my mind. Later they flew when I had a trouble. Again betrayal stories - from the ones who said "Sir, we will take this venture to the highest level", "Anna we have to do this in a more quality"

Recently one separation of a young man, from me, some one like that of Peter who said the words I said above just reminded the following

Dear Jesus I strongly hold your word "Amen - Truly I say to you this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny me three times"

It is not just him. It is almost everyone whom I had. Strange world, Strange people.

Always One has to sacrifice to remind about the change the Damn Society needs

 SEX IS ONLY BETTER AND WILL BE SO INTIMATE AND REAL PLEASURE IF YOU HAVE IT WITH YOUR LIFE PARTNER.

The society needs an incident like that of in "Delhi", the brutal violence done for a poor girl. The protests are burning like an intensified fire spreading all over the nation. All is good. But my real stupid maybe sometimes, do we always need an incident like this to know about the change we need.

For what damn *** purpose we are protesting without even knowing that the change has to start from ourselves. Psychologically every human despite of the age is lured to the demon of SEX, through

• Media and Movies
• Social Media Networks
• Pornography Websites/Movies
• Private chats/Easy Mobile Access
• Increased Dating Culture adopted from Western Countries

All have the easy access to all these things nowadays. It cannot be controlled by a government. I dont mean to be Conservative. But of real freedom.

Scene 1:

A woman is talking so freely to her set of male friends. Somewhere around 8 o clock in the night.
What they talk is all about romance and movies.

Scene  2:

A would be couple may be or we can call lovers, are busy with their intimate acts in a beach shore

Blessed be the World, who exploited me

It was too late when I realized that only "THIS SELFISH WORLD" has separated me from my loving ones for its own utter selfishness. A Tamil saying says "Theethum Nanrum Pirar Thara Vaaraa" - Good and Bad doesn't come from anyone else than one self.

I put that into my mind and had a deep inquiry about those verses. Yes, I am the reason for my losses, coz I have not recognized the world as it is. I believed, trusted blindly anybody.

My bitter experiences keeps me away from everything in this world, except I am so happy that the almighty is with me.

Blessed be the World, who exploited me intentionally......

SHAME ON US - REAL INDEPENDENT INDIA - ??????? SO EMBARASSING

This is making my heart feel so heavy...The open something culture, spreading among youngsters never makes them think even about their safety. Spread of inappropriate contents on media, social media and everywhere in the society without fundamental something, a craze and booze on westernization among youngsters is creating a big trouble in the Land of Great Culture and Civilization. SHAME ON US. This is not just for that girl, it can happen to any... What to say?

We need a fundamental change... in all aspects... What are we going to do with the goons. Can't anybody travel even in buses...?

What do I long for? Friends or Foe?

None to share my real thoughts. No real friends. No real people. This may be an intimidate statement. I remember once I was so friendly, but soon when I realized everybody used me and none of them is true from their heart, when my best friend (as I called him) left without no traces - everyone said "it is what in you have made everybody to move away". Life's strange games.

Moved with some social networks like facebook, and how people communicate with each other, I know I am a stranger in this world. Left alone. Somebody once said me "When no one is there, then feel that GOD is there for you". Verbally it sounds good but in its actuals.

My life is moving on...no one to appreciate my actions - right from my parents, family and friends (if somebody is there). I long for something which I missed in my life while seeing the social networks and at least happy friends - boys, girls.

I am a silly human. I know the losses are because I never lived an appropriate life which is suitable to my age.

All I long for is few people to whom I can talk, live my life to its extent. But never happened and think will never happen. Lonely and heavy hearted. My life will be an example for at least somebody telling what to do and what not.

I often think do I have to move away from these people connecting Social Networks, one or other day, I may. Knowing that only THE ALMIGHTY IS THERE FOR ME.

No one Shall tell you the "Truth" unless "You" hear it..

Rather understanding him fully in his truest sense, we often feel that only attending Holy masses will help us be a part of His Flesh. There is a deep underlying "Truth" in that words, which priests even don't know in its truest sense. Because theology is considered as a course of certification. Bible Study needs Classes. Bible becomes a "Study" subject. Who made it? The real reason? We blindly study everything, without inquiring it. Without seeking it?

My experiments with life continues. My seeking too. I have learnt to be alone in life. When I read J.Krishnamurti about Loneliness and Being Alone as both mere intelligent, different terms, I can really absorb the essence of these words. I remember a day three years past I wrote in my journal "Nothing or Nobody belongs to me, and I don't belong to anything or anybody". 

My intricate thought patterns and a kind of seeking in life always lead to something which amuses or irritates many. "Truth" do irritates always. I can see people who are deceiving themselves, deceiving others, deceiving the Supreme Father without even seeking what is called "Truth". In my life experiences I learn't "Truth" is not a thing which can be sought out roaming somewhere else, here and there. You cannot find peace unless or otherwise if you find it in yourself. It is already there, one has to be silent to listen to it. When I understood the deep meaning of these words, I realized what exactly JESUS CHRIST mentioned the term

"Ask. You will be Answered. Seek. You will Get. Knock. The Door will be Opened"

"No One shall tell ye what is "Truth" unless Ye shall hear it"

Deep words to be understood deeply. Truth is everlasting. If one realizes it, then one can live happily and harmoniously with Christ what he termed as "PEACE".

Rather understanding him fully in his truest sense, we often feel that only attending Holy masses will help us be a part of His Flesh. There is a deep underlying "Truth" in that words, which priests even don't know in its truest sense. Because theology is considered as a course of certification. Bible Study needs Classes. Bible becomes a "Study" subject. Who made it? The real reason? We blindly study everything, without inquiring it. Without seeking it?

I can confirm this with many questions fired at me, one session being an example. There was this person who is so pious will never miss a holy mass, a prayer session, a novena. A Catholic Christian. We were discussing something about spirituality. I was comparing everything about the whole humanity and the diversity which is caused by the religious thoughts.

At one point he questioned me,"You are talking about Supreme Consciousness as Eternal Father. You don't follow the church principles, but you represent yourself as  True follower of the "Word". You Admire Christ. But if you don't follow the rituals or sacraments you cannot be part of his Flesh and Blood. Can you?"

I promptly questioned back,

Masked Menace - The controversies of the Social Outlook

Long time after I am posting again. Days and months of no sleep, heavy work has slowed down my physiological and psychological aspects in my health. Slow thinking, loss in stamina, increased numbness in both the limbs, eating heavily my resources day by day. I understand the clock is ticking fast. I have to run little bit faster, but need a little bit rest too. Adrenaline is confused with my thought patterns.

It was when I heard from an Ayurvedic Physician at Kerala that it could take another 2 years for 40% betterment from my physical pains, I refused the treatments. I said I already learnt to live with pain. Now I am little bit organized, know what to do at what time. Hours of Heavy prayers and Meditation, with Yoga, constant touch with Nature, Skywatch my pastime everything heals, my mental agonies. I started putting full stops to my expectations and disappointments. A state of Everything in Nothing, Nothing in Everything.

When I talk about this reality, many call me I am living in darkness. My keen answer questioning them, "Can you deny the Fact that you face this particular "Thing" now", "Can you deny the Truth?"

I have come across a lot of situations someone saying,"You must not be open or act innocent in this society, your value will go", "You must act as what you are in certain situations", 'You must be a roman when you are in rome" etc., Whatever may be the fact my only one question is "Can you deny the Truth?"

The Fundamental Change

One man can stop drinking only if he understands fundamentally it causes lots of trouble to his and others life. No Pope, No government, a parade or a Hunger strike can change the inner attitude of a human being.

Life is at its own will. Uncertainty can be seen all through my day's fragments. Pain and hurt pricks my mind like anything. One side a remarkable accomplishment. A pride in doing what others said or at least thought that I can't do. Another side deep downside losses. Humans. Even after lot of inquiries, changes one thing I cannot understand is the structure of Human Mind and the Society.

If I am going to talk about something at which this society applauds with pleasure, then I am called successful. But at the same time if I do or say something which is currently needed or relevant to the society or at least a single human, to solve the current chaos or crisis among themselves, then I am called the ODD ONE. Recent happenings in my life is something like that.

I don't like anybody to call me “Enlightened”, because as such nothing is there. Light is already there, but as humans we deny the light and live in darkness. Most of us are living as deceivers not true at all, at least to one's own self. We are seeking orders from other humans – yes humans. We follow humans and not the bare naked truth. We need a leader whatever it is and wherever it is, let it be religion, a nation or a simple church. We have not realised how true are they the seekers of the “Truth”.

One bare truth one cannot deny is “No control can change the human life”. One can talk about the change, one can expect change but these all are not in their actuals and we expect from others. A pope or a religious leader and his orders cannot change the inner mind.

One man can stop drinking only if he understands fundamentally it causes lots of trouble to his and others life. No Pope, No government, a parade or a Hunger strike can change the inner attitude of a human being. No religious government, No political government can change unless or otherwise it tries to find out the root cause of the problem deep inside each and every single human mind and uproot it.

If I cannot change, then others won't, if others won't then society won't. But we are afraid of this fundamental change as this would keep us odd. Sometimes society keeps us away by naming something superior or inferior from itself.

Who is ready to tie the bells for this CAT?

Educational Institutions Educate us to ACT.....

What I bother is... There is no Education for the Actual Fundamental Change in Life.. All Education and Educational Institutes are Fake..Educationalists are Fake..

If Not so.. We talk about Endangered Species.. conserving nature..Get medals.. awards etc., but have we really achieved what is called conservation.. have we conserved it actually....?????

ALL EDUCATION AND EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTIONS TEACH US TO ACT AS MERE ACTORS IN STAGE.. AS THEMSELVES THEY ARE ACTUALLY...

they ever cannot make a human.....rather than machines.. and those who are behind it deserve nothing in universal laws to talk about it...

Beauty is not in the Skin or Muscles... What Else to Say.. no Words....!!!

To have a complete outlook of this story go to this yahoo link

http://in.lifestyle.yahoo.com/blogs/she/lessons-worlds-ugliest-woman-stop-staring-start-learning-184400606.html

My Few Favorite Songs (playlist)

Presenting My Second Print Book - You are that Miracle

I wanted to release this in this Friend's Day, What I wanted to talk to a friend, a youngster, whose potential if  recognized will work out miracles. Friendship an outbound relationship is only having that power to criticize and appreciate his friends actions with proper rights.  I did it in this.

 Anyone can  download this from my website www.alphaatomega.com

Once again somebody reminded me of Life's Uncertainty

One of my first ever supporter in my social activities, When I started this first ever club for nature conservation and registered it as a Non - Governmental Organisation, he was there. He said, " Whatever we do, we will do together". Years passed by, he is not even 32, my same age, suddenly died in a road accident, once again reminding me of the life's uncertainty. Good gracious, let his soul rest in peace. I had very countable number of friends. Here is another in your hands. Let him be with you. I have little more duty my father, please excuse me. Will be with you soon!!!

Is there anybody in this world who can cast the first stone...???

Edited and Compiled Bible, knowing not where the sources are from exactly, being said only scholars can read the original Hebraic Bible, What they preach, What they do? Jesus Christ when he entered Jerusalem, he saw people selling animals etc., for sacrifice in the synagogue campus, for the first time he gets angry and lashes out all the shops and vendors saying "This is my father's place, don't make it a market"

A victim myself, a true follower of Christ (not what the world calls Christianity), a sinner though, I have seen all these rubbishes in the so called conservative christian college. What do they conserve? the secret ditching reputation for maintaining the business or something else.

"Paapam Cheyyathavar Kalleriyatte"

What do the Organizations do? What do the Youth Clubs do, when everything is unethical or immoral in this world? Who the hell is there to cast the first stone? Can this control or hideous actions of this world's best religious authority bring what Jesus called "Peace".. only when we shake hands in the holy(?!) mass verbally..huh.. strange world my father.. 

Call it The Breathing Gap.....

A day before once again I was occupied with a heavy breathing suffocation, some physiological discomfort leaving my nostrils closed, no in and out oxygen, trying to breath heavily but no way. Having nobody around me to help, I thought its going to be the end. My heart pounced and raced as if I was driving a McLaren. 

Real Question my mind asked was, if this is going to be your last few minutes, what will you do. I was helpless. I wanted to talk with my beloved ones. I wanted to hear voices. I wanted to eat my favorite chicken dishes. I wanted to make sure the venture I have started once again to be in the right place. I wanted to make sure my "Angelo" will create history. Lots and Lots. Heavy and heavy, my fingers running fast in my touchscreen mobile. Yes I know I'm dying here. For the first time in my life I'm praying, "elongate my life little bit more, I have some duties to do, I have to fulfill my promises".

But what if it was an end? I'm going through it. Many people often think, let us do it in the future. I will fix up my broken relationship tomorrow. I will achieve one or other day. I will earn money and abundant wealth soon. 

I will... I will.. I will... WHO NEEDS THIS I WILL FOR I KNOW ONLY I'M LIVING NOW. IF HUMANS REALLY UNDERSTAND THIS ONE, THOUGH HOPE OF LIVING TOMORROW IS THERE REMAINING ONLY AS HOPE, A PROBABILITY, REALITY IS I'M LIVING NOW. I WILL IS ONLY A DREAM AN ILLUSION, CANNOT ALWAYS BE A REALITY.

On realization of this one, there will be true fruitful life with fruitful relationships. But ever in this world of devils hands its not going to happen. Many like me have to die with agony. 

THE TIME I GOT TO WRITE THIS I CAN CALL THE BREATHING GAP. Hell with this life of vanity....!!!!

Actually life starts with Self Realization...

 “Realizing Actually That I have to Learn about Me, and I flow with the Flow of Life without any strong Resistance” is actual self-realization (notice the word realization) and that could be called illumination, salvation or enlightenment anything we name it.

I was having a talk with my Senior Colleague while we were travelling in an auto rickshaw to Krishnamurti Foundation of India, Chennai. At one point of time, in the discussion, he just expressed, he is in the process of knowing himself. That quest is lifelong and ends when he realizes himself. He also expressed that the fact is he is not able to study and understand himself.

I was thinking about it and replied,” Sir, If that is your actual quest and if you have inquired properly into yourself, you would have studied yourself and illumination or self realization or enlightenment would have taken place”.

He disagreed,” If we know ourselves, that would be the end of life, because nothing else will be there. Then if we understand ourselves how there will be chance of conflicts, problems and everything that is utter stupidity in life. It will not happen for anybody at any point of time in his life”.

I stopped the talk by saying,” It’s not like that but something else”, didn’t shared what I wanted to share, but planned to share to everyone.

Followed, Following and the Followers

Life is a chain in which one follows another and that one by another. It is the process of evolution physically, psychologically and even scientifically one is subjected to follow something or somebody. One precedes and the other supersedes. Cosmically all kind of evolution took place like that. There was a beginning and now the continuation. But who is seeking what is next, right from the depth of the mind. What if one just followed what other said or preached else taught, followed just like that? There won't be innovation, there won't be a seeking mind. Without seeking there is no realization of Truth.

It is not that one saying, "He said like this, she did this, he is my role model, he enlightened me with his words, his sayings brought me lot of insights". A man when he starts thinking like this, idealizing the idea of others, consequently stops thinking and fills his mind with the ideas of these others. The ideas which makes him the follower of that others.

I'm worried more about these people...

Joy and cheerfulness is not for specific group of people. I never mind saying that only one group of people are blessed and the other cursed. Curse and Gift comes from human minds itself. World filled completely with lust often makes me heavy. On one side a complete group is cheering its life, with others money, on other side one group is starving for food and just for all basic needs.

I'm not worried about these people at all, they dance with devil, they don't own even the money, they roll on with their parent's money, bullying on others for money and wealth, materials etc., they have (hell with them)

but I'm worried and concerned more about these people

 

New Beginnings

Cosmic Laws are always true.. There is a new beginning in every ending... Thanks to my current team members for producing this video.

Instead of being the next somebody, can I please be the next me.....

A Must Watch Advertisement

Hats off to these Ad makers... Freeing up mind from conditioning to be somebody, everyone have their own talents...own kind of talents and potential. Why resemble somebody? I want more people to get inspired by this ad and become something next themselves.. REAL HISTORIANS......

Am I a cynic?

A Cynic is a man who know the price of everything and the value of nothing. - Oscar Wilde

I don't always try to put blame on others for my own failures. I never intended to.  If then I may be a cynic. I very well know no one else is the reason for my own failures in my endeavors. Experience always makes every human perfect. I always wondered whether I try to find faults on others for my own mistakes. But the answer in my realization is no. I have done zero analysis many times, the finding is same. I never play blame game, but only can't tolerate when others do the same on me.

I am walking in my own path of life. No human tried to understand that I too have emotions, feelings and all that rubbish sense what a human have. When others intend to put the blame or cast the burden on me, I feel I am weak in one or other way to bear it. The losses wealth wise, Financial, interpersonal relationship losses everything makes me weak. If I have to get rid of all those things then I might have to leave all humanly thoughts. I am not always skeptical about those things. But I do wonder always why others do this. I wonder why they are so keen in suppressing others, make them depressed only for being so true to them. The outcome even in these posts in my blog are results of the outburst of that honesty.

Its not that Live and Let Live. Its Let Live and Live Properly. Don't make anyone scapegoats for one's own mistakes. Don't ever offer a goat as a sacrifice to God for getting relieved for your own mistakes.

AT ANY COST I AM NOT A FAULT FINDER. I AM JUST A REALIST. I UNDERSTAND ALL HAVE THEIR OWN SET OF FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS. BUT I JUST WANT OTHERS ALSO TO UNDERSTAND I TOO A HUMAN WITH MY OWN SET OF THE SO CALLED FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS!!

How much Can you eat Computers, Cameras or Human Bodies....

Petty human mind don't stop at anything. So cunning, so irrational. When I did the lecturer job, I did my level best to teach them what I know. Nobody know how my employer juiced up my skills and victimized me for the same. If they have sent some specialist in one area to accompany me, then I would have been saved from all these humbugs. But no one is going to understand I taught them wholeheartedly spending full time for them itself.

But the recent reward from the one from the HUMAN, who has not quenched the thirst drinking my blood, who wants my dead body too, to eat, have recently send me a mail of this pic

An added statement " I thought you know everything, but I understood you knew nothing".

I am not hesitant to state this. Because if I am timid that my value will go, tomorrow these pranks will eat some other. Is he talking about the technical skills? Any sill idiot can teach technology. As I said earlier, sleep well with computers, cameras, well with anybody they like. How much they can be able to eat these things.

Is the technical know-how, the worldly knowledge? I know very well even if Walt-Disney himself comes and teaches animation or George Lucas Visual Effects, this damn idiot won't learn anything.

The problem is with the family and educational institution, whose selection is all for money. But the victims are somebody else, Like me Being a single person who tried to teach serving Humanity to them. No other Illusionist Magician or Effect Technician have done this, there in that college. What I taught is not Magic or Techniques, but Life itself, out of my own experiences.

The actual problem is with the friends and class mates who supported or supports these people. Who the heck are they, silly humans, living for bodily pleasure?

ONE HAPPENED WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE ITSELF, THE NEXT TO SHUT DOWN MY BUSINESS, THE NEXT TO PUT ME IN THE STATE OF HEMI-PARESIS, NOW AGAIN. THESE VAMPIRES WON'T STOP. WORLD IS WITH DEVIL. BUT NOT FOR LONG TIME....

LET THE COSMIC LAWS ANSWER........

Will Struggle with Flight for Humanity until the Last Feather falls...

THAT WAS AND IS MY ULTIMATE GOAL IN LIFE. DO SOMETHING FOR FELLOW BEINGS AND DIE. I WILL STRUGGLE MY LEVEL BEST UNTIL MY LAST FEATHER FALLS AND LOOSE MY FLIGHT. NO MATTER I AM ALONE.

Loneliness kills. But in another sense, it is better to be alone than to be with people who can't understand us. I'm isolating myself. But still the thirst to fetch the needs of "humanity" is there. I know it is for these same humans who betrayed and condemned me for nothing. The reasons which are baked up by themselves. Now I'm left with nobody for one noble cause I fight for.

People often wants technological accomplishments, pleasure drives, pleasure party's, everything momentary. They call it life. All is well if contained in limit. What about a person who is ambitious, who wants to achieve something globally. Not just in some technical field or to be a celebrity, but I was ambitious to do something for something in greater sense - Humanity.

If I talk about greater wider areas of myriad colors, Music, Big Movie making, VFX works, people applauded. When I asked them to stop the aspects of momentary pleasure and work for Humanity, they cursed. But people go to temple, church, mosques pray to god, pretending praying for others, but in action nothing.

SICK OF HUMANS. THEY DECEIVE GOD, THEY DECEIVE THEMSELVES, THEY DECEIVE OTHERS.

Beyond my ambition of becoming a technical jargon, a big blockbuster movie maker, an animator anything you can name it, my ultimate ambition in my life is to SERVE HUMANITY. I even wanted to become a celebrity only to serve this purpose. Because when I say with empty hands nobody hears.

There will be thousands, and of course there are thousands who are technologically sound, sleep with computers, sleep with whatever they like. But how much of people are doing this,

• sponsoring orphan children who are really in need, when one's income is too low to sustain his family.
• mould up individuals to realize themselves, their skills and to live in a better way without conflicts.
• seek the Truth about God, not just what religious institutions teach or preach.
• mingle the real cosmological facts and philosophies, and live according to that.
• cries for the fellow being who is really suffering in the neighborhood.
• worries and do the needful for the abandoned old age people.
• Tries to give education in a proper way to proper hands.

All I wanted to do is this. I currently do this all together. Sometimes sound crazy.

One can do Illusional Magic, Illusional Screen Effects, Animate Puppets, Talk freely about erotica but petty selfishness and conning others are ditching acts. Actually I don't want to express myself like this, but I wonder why people talk what they don't know actually.

I always wanted to serve humanity, what I do only I say, What I say only I will always do. With this post is a scan of the document of registration of a Charitable Trust IN THE YEAR 2006 I started in my most beloved Grandma's name, for the sake of humanity. THAT WAS AND IS MY ULTIMATE GOAL IN LIFE. DO SOMETHING FOR FELLOW BEINGS AND DIE. I WILL STRUGGLE MY LEVEL BEST UNTIL MY LAST FEATHER FALLS AND LOOSE MY FLIGHT. NO MATTER I AM ALONE.

LOVE - Inspiring thoughts of JK

Is love the product of thought? Is love in the field of time? Is love pleasure? Is love comething that can be cultivated, practised or put together by thought? In inquiring into this one has to go into the question: Is love pleasure - Sexual or any kind of pleasure?

Our mind is pursuing pleasure all the time: yesterday I had a good meal, the pleasure of that meal is recorded and I want more, a better meal or the same kind of meal tomorrow. I have taken great delight in the sunset or looking at the moon through the leaves. That beauty gives great delight and that is great pleasure. The mind records it and wants it repeated. Thought thinks about sex, thinks, chews over it, wants it repeated; and that you call love. Right? Don't be shy when we talk about sex, that's part of your life. You have made it hideous because you have denied every kind of freedom except that one freedom.

So is love pleasure? Is Love put together by thought, as pleasure is put together by thought? Is love envy? Can anyone love who is envious, who is greedy, ambitious, violent, conforming, obeying totally in disorder? So what is Love? It is not any of these things, obviously. It is not pleasure. Please understand the importance of pleasure. Pleasure is sustained by thought; therefore thought is not love. Thought cannot cultivate love. It can and does cultivate the pursuit of pleasure, as it does fear, but thought cannot create love, or put it together. See the Truth. See it and you will put away your ambition, your greed, altogether. So through negation you come to the most extraordinary thing called love, which is the most positive.

Disorder in relationship means there is no love, and that disorder exists when there is conformity. So a mind that conforms to a pattern of pleasure, or what it thinks is love, can never know what love is. A mind that has understood that whole ripening of disorder comes to an order which is VIRTUE, therefore which is love.

J.Krishnamurti
www.jkrishnamurti.org

Sound Mind in a Sound Body.............

"Sound mind in a sound body in a sound environment" definition of health from WHO. First comes sound mind. but I'm afraid I can find people who can count with mental wellness. Doctors prescribe medicines and treatments to heal the body. But what and who can heal the mind. Being one of the person who was wounded seriously in mind, I have not yet come across a single individual who recognized my mental troubles.

My Bi-Polarity was the cause of troubles in my animation development studio. Still that is common for most creators I think so. But when that lead into too much of depression caused by the betrayals without the true understanding of a person called "ME", all single individuals I encountered in my life failed me. A man with physical wound is recognized with it. A handicapped person, anything we can name it. But what about some serious injuries in the mind. Mind is so soft in nature, it unknowingly records everything from the lame nurse we are handed over to in our birth to persons and happenings until this moment. The outcomes can be positive and negative both. This is what psychology taught me. Nobody understood exactly what I am. A child can cry for it longing, but how a man could. I wanted to succeed in life. But I failed. I agree, I'm the reason for my failure knowingly or unknowingly. I agree, but my question is how many around me tried to recognize me as I am or as I was truly?

Still no single human mind.....

Life Partnership - Bone of Bones, Flesh of Flesh

There was a discussion going on with my friends on the current chaotic world especially in the world of man and woman relationships. One of them asked me, “What exactly do you think as the reason of the increased number of illicit relationships, divorces and all”?

It is an easier question to answer this is the problem of the society, that, this and the change of culture anything. But I had a deep thinking. “Okay, what is the reason?” I put on the question to my mind itself. In these increased number of divorces and relationship breakups, only few are genuine cases. Please no question of what is here genuine. If a person cannot tolerate, the physical and mental torture of his/her partner, say abusive behavior, physical stunts, unfaithfulness in anything, especially in sexual intimacy, that happens in due relationship without proper understanding, few cases among this becomes genuine. Absolutely intolerable; I name only few.

But if there is a ratio 45 out 100 cases are filed for breakup then it means, people are so discontented with the relationships they have now. They get into relationship without knowing the true nature of Love and relationship. The mass media today imposes lots of different kinds of relationships including homo sexualities, all kinds of erotica etc..,

Don't Cry for those who don't value your tears.....

You are an open book. Many have to read you. I know you always attempted to sow your seeds wherever you go. But when it is in a healthy soil, it grew up. When it is among the rocks, how can you expect the growth. Leave those rocks. Don't cry for those who don't value you at all and ignored your words.

My long time friend visited me recently. A meeting of an example that cosmic laws and cosmic connections will never fail. I know him for the past 14 years. My college mate. When I stayed in hostel during my college days we use to talk a lot about the life and how we have to live, how ambitious it has to be, what kind of service we have to do for the humanity etc., We talked for hours, planning and channelizing lot of things. We discussed about the universal laws. He is now a Managing Director of a reputed group of companies in south Tamil Nadu region. When I was about to fail in my business, fall in my third attempt he was my only target to get the investment. Even he accepted, there were these board members who rejected the plea at that time, because of the pranks played upon by my lovable team members and students. The whole story is in this blog itself.

This friend now arrived with a proposal, after seeing all my agony, pain and tears, he visited my home recently, asking me to join the board of that company itself to work out whatever I wished to do. I am happy that he traveled all along to take me to give a life when I am broken and also saying "Do whatever you wished to do in this world", because he knows me very well. He was with me right from the first step I took for my ambitions. Along with him there were few board directors who also visited my house to take me into their company.

I hesitated a lot because of my illness, pain and unstable physical conditions. The people who accompanied him at one point of time said a word "Sir, our MD has said about you, your thoughts, your knowledge of cosmology and importance of cosmic laws, which is the base foundation of our company. We know it is you who played a big role in tailoring him. Now he is managing our company well with a monthly turnover of Rs.50 to 60 lakhs minimum. There will be major discussions in our company on what you spoken itself. Now we want to hear from you directly. Your thoughts and actions are necessary for the well being of many people".

I was so happy that a seed I sown earlier have grown up a big tree now with sweet fruits. Still I hesitated saying, "It is because him, he learn't, he grasped whatever I said, He inquired into himself, he sought the necessity of the truth. I am a just a trump card. I actually sleeping here in this room, for

Way of Cross in it's True Self - A Video by Me

A small initiative by me to understand the real sacrifice of Jesus Christ.  A sacrifice to be observed truly and not just as rituals and processions

Who has to understand me than myself?

Parents, relations, Wife and then later with friends, and also with the people I called the "beloved ones or dearest" the same case remained. Nobody understood the real me.

Actually I didn't achieved anything except the hatred of everybody, friends, relations, wife, parents and the other whom I call "dearest".

Its rather a human feeling that I need to be understood and recognized by my fellow human beings. In fact I belong to the same human category. This question often pops up in my mind "Why he/she is not understanding me?" Let it be with my mother or father, else my wife or friends, whoever it may be, I always felt this need of understanding from others.

I was a too curious young human, as the name suggests, when I was young. I wanted to know many things, I wanted to learn many things. I wanted to learn karate, music, keyboard, dancing, horse riding etc., :-) I was so active, wondered how this world is filled with so many wonders as this one life is not enough at all. I wanted to be recognized from whatever skill I acquire. Mentally I needed support. I know I have given them enough. But a universal concept is Love is unconditional. But knowing that still I longed for something. A understanding of the real me, the "What I am and What do I want to do?"

But things don't happen in the same way as we think of it. Right? If it happened so then I would not be in the condition in which I am now.

Christ in his truest sense...!!!

So lets make it clear. You are Christ's Follower or Christian Follower?

I was discussing with one of my young friend. I mean he is younger than me and with full of speculations and own opinions in his mind. I usually gather with such young fellows and have a discussion, because their nature of opening up their mind with their own questions. It is the concept of “Ask, You will answered”. When our mind opens up with whatever it have seeking the right answer, then the answer which is already there will reach us or in the right term, it will be known to us. In case I am not trying to say that I am providing them with answers, but it when triggers my inner self which always seeks with hell a lot of questions, then in one or other way I will also get answer. It is a mutual endeavor. The following is one such a discussion.

He: Anna, I am a born Christian, I used to go to church regularly, but stopped at one moment, I don't know why. It may be because I don't like the happenings there or else I feel something more beyond is there. But the people around me says that I am “sinning” by this activity. Is that a sin, anna? But I am a true christian follower.

Me: What are you trying to say? Lets make it clear once for all. Are you a Christian Follower or Christ's Follower. I think both differ in its own sense. Christianity is the name or term which has been given to the people who are said to be following Christ. I agree. But now the term refers clearly those who follows the methodologies, an organised structure formulated by the Higher Authoritarian Church, in the base of its dogmas and rituals etc.,

So lets make it clear. You are Christ's Follower or Christian Follower?

Duality - The act of Pretense in day to day life

Is it possible to work with honesty in our day to day life? With colleagues, with bosses, with relationship etc., If I pretend is it not like cheating oneself or GOD or Supreme Being himself. 

An interesting dialogue went on between me and my friend, later with couple of people at Krishnamurti Foundation India, in analyzing whether the honesty of proper "ME" is possible out of philosophy and whether it could be applied in our day to day life. I put forward the question as I am victim of that so called "Honesty and Duality".

I was honest to my students, when I taught, unlike that other technical jargonists, who knew nothing but making money and making fun of others. I was honest to my HOD and the college management, when others were just pretending. But later when I discovered, I was betrayed and condemned by these collective people called the "Society" - the bullish "society", this question arouse in me, whether it is possible to live with honesty in mind and still pretend as something else, more or less a hypocrite.

Defining Success

A society which defines a role or rule, when that becomes a hurdle for itself, it will again tend to redefine it according to the newest needs. 

Life cannot be at ease always as we desire. We cannot neglect the desires too. So what is the connection between desires and success. I'm longing for someone to call me a successful person. But I know no one would. Then the longing shall have to cease. Does success means as what is defined by the society? Does it means materialistic benefit? Does it means a luxurious car? Does it mean an accomplishment and promotion in the social status? Does it mean we become a public speaker admired by many? Does it mean holding some president post somewhere in an institution? Does it mean the technological accomplishment?

It can be anyone of this or all of this. But is that the real meaning or definition of success. When analyzing the scenarios in deep, I understood only one thing, not the matter whether it is big or small, if a conflict arises from an accomplishment which leads us to sorrow, then merely it cannot be defined as success itself. Am I not right? We run for money, to build a new house, to buy Mercedes, to keep us physically healthy, but after all do we have the necessary happiness and peace. There are many who are living with conflicts, though they are financially sound. So how come materialistic benefit and advancement is success?

Life will continue until there is hope...

Name, Fame and Money..In the Name of Lord..

Lenten Season 2012 is on...many people are busy with their fasting, church ceremonies, preparations etc., Many years back I don't know what is this "Lent"? But when I came more closer to Christ I understood what it is and What exactly it is for. I am not a born christian, a christian never have to. Whoever follows Christ Truly are True Christians. Underline and Understand this word Truly.

In life in many circumstances, with many people I underwent a similar situation or a similar discussion after I become a True Follower of Christ. Principles of Jesus won't suit current day's living.

Shamelessly a person in a presiding position of a Christian Organisation said this once to me, " I am a Catholic Christian, but still I have to give up his sayings at times and act as a complete businessman". 

My Pain may be the reason for somebody's Laugh

After years I just tried something with my photo retouching skills using Photoshop. A skill put into coffin box years ago. Just had a trial with my photo itself. Inspired by a Hard but True thought while reading his bio-graphy, Charlie Chaplin, the genius and his off screen life is almost forgotten. What a kind of life is this??? So true words it is not so easy to make others laugh, while one is simply crying inside, he did it and inspires me to do the same. I'm just trying to imitate him in the looks, but follow his role-model in real life.

My First Book "Letters to My Unborn Daughter"

Femininity itself is like a flower. The fragrance of it alone will bring ecstasy. It has to be admired. It has to be protected. 

Happy Woman's Day

I always admire the beauty called femininity. A miracle of the world.At the same time while seeing the trouble they have or face in day to day life, I often think, why do such being should be existent. But when their real potential is understood and if they do things in the right way, they are way ahead to be the supreme power of the world. But this could be only a dream in the male dominant world. As a male I should be ashamed of it.

I managed to write my first book. First print published book. Thanks to my publisher friend. I wanted hardly to release this on this day, a compilation of what I would say to my daughter. But the reality is I'm not yet blessed with a child, any child even after years of marriage. Women do read it. You can also opt for buying in the print version for just Rs.50, seriously money making is not my intention. Just happy to release my first book to spread this message which I feel as necessary to the real "Woman Empowerment".  These are just but common things but discussed in a man's perspective. Don't expect extraordinary discussions.

Here is the link to download : http://bit.ly/y4CKa6

If anybody there to support my efforts, buy the print version. If you need a print version or ff you have any critics after reading please mail me at avr.thecreator@ymail.com

Wondering who is Seetharaman Narayanan?

We always wondered who is SEETHARAMAN NARAYANAN in Photoshop Splash Screen. I started noticing his name in the splash screen of Photoshop right from the days when I started using version 4.0. Here is a video

Now my question is how many wanted to achieve something like that. I will raise my hands if you ask the same question. We see celebs at some heights. Some feel it as heights unreachable. Some are lazy. All heights are achievable if we start taking steps one by one. Right?

Failures and responsibility..

I am often asked or offered with a piece of advice from people that I made a mistake in life by taking some wrong kind of people to realize my ambition or start my company or whatever it is. And that I am the sole responsibility of my failures. To analyze this some facts:

• I chose people who belong to that field or who chose the field as their choice in life. After ensuring that is their career choice and passion only I selected them.(The bitter truth is some got job in some other sector or industry..life's choices or chaos?!)
• I am a strong believer of Stephen R.Covey's Win-Win Policy. I took them with a hope that I will realize my ambition in the same time they will take a step ahead in their career.
• The plan was to have a long time connection with the people I chose. For example, involving them in the ESOP plan if company goes public as well as profitable ie., a life time income for them with dividends.
• I have not seen them just as employees but more than that. So I was keen in developing their personal aspects too. I wanted to bring or make them find a leader in them.
• I was not a holder of big business stakes, but a person hoping for a better future as themselves. I started the company to earn a living as well as to realize my long time dream only. This I made them clear in the first day of opening my business itself. A 3 hour meeting or open talk you can call it.
• I wanted them to share my visions. So I always use to talk about that too and make them work for that.

Nothing of the above worked out, because of their ignorance.But really if one at least from that ten have done it right means, I would not have failed. At times when I am securing investments, let it be with other investors or else to my parents, I pronounced one sentence "I know them well and they know me well", The aspect in which I wrong and led to my failure. It is not the game of efficient management or something. It is a game of efficient "MAN" ment. Not as a business, but I wanted it as You win, I will also win with you. But now the question comes like. You failed, who is going to take up the responsibility. Mr. Covey you got any answer?

Liberal Family, Ignorant Education & Open Media - Path to Destruction

What the hell is happening in this world? Or atleast in India? Aren't we cultured? Does not our nation is famous for its own defined culture? Where do these demons come from? I am afraid to go out of the house nowadays, just only because I will hear something worst. I am afraid to open the news papers or watch TV only just because I will come to know something worst. I am afraid nowadays to login online even. Worst, Worst and Worst news everywhere. Especially of what is called as SEX. The damn devil is ruling almost everybody. Every silly individual. In these days more immorally. Continuously within few days I came across three different news in Yahoo, while I am checking my mail. I surfed them with heavy pain in MIND AND NOT TO SAY MY BODY IS ALMOST GONE.

NEWS 1 : Five Students Gang Raped a girl in CHENNAI, Tamilnadu.
NEWS 2 : 14 men Gang Raped two teenage girls in INDORE, MP Shot MMS
NEWS 3 : NOIDA teenager Gang-raped in a Car by four.


One common aspect I found in these three cases is this, the girls are well known or good friends for atleast two in each gang. Is it the fruitful benefit of the friendship? Or where we are mistaking. Aching all over the mind and body, as if these girls belong to my own family, or thinking in the position of the family members of those girls. What the hell is happening. It is intolerable. The problem is happening between two sexes, but the fact is the problem comes only to the girls. It is the common aspect all over the world, irrespective of it is America or Africa.

Society's Shameless Teachings

 “Man is by nature a social animal; an individual who is unsocial naturally and not accidentally is either beneath our notice or more than human. Society is something that precedes the individual. Anyone who either cannot lead the common life or is so self-sufficient as not to need to, and therefore does not partake of society, is either a beast or a god. ” 
                                                                                                                     ― Aristotle, Politics

There is no wonder in this saying. We human who just pretend to be mature are not mature enough actually. We take up and learn from things what happen in the society. Often our fingers point out the mistakes of what others are doing to justify our own mistakes. Apart from talking long philosophies, if we try to implement them in our day to day life we will ashamed as if we are nude in front of thousand others. But that too is not considered shame on these days. Reason, the saying above. But after all that application is only stressed by almost all religous dogmas of the world.

Development of technologies paves path for new kind of anomalies in human behaviour. When such anomalies increases in numbers and in more human minds, it becomes part of society's virtue. We name it as development of new generation. Human adapt to anomalies more than their self factor of life without conflicts. Plainly talking, there are increased number of immoral, un-ethical activities nowadays. When question arises as said above the fingers easily point out the society. "Everybody is like that, So am I", "There is nothing called wrong in this current society. We cannot live as per philosophies or religions", "I am so social or friendly that no one would regret my presence among them. I am so happy with it", an individual's statement would go on.

Conflict of the Opposites

A week before when an youngster asked this question to me "Anna, what in this world is Good and What is Bad?"

I quote here a saying by renowned philosopher J.Krishnamurthi to add more.


I wonder if there is such a thing as evil? Please give your attention, go with me, let us inquire together. We say there is good and evil. There is envy and love, and we say that envy is evil and love is good. Why do we divide life, calling this good and that bad, thereby creating the conflict of the opposites? Not that there is not envy, hate, brutality in the human mind and heart, an absence of compassion, love, but why do we divide life into the thing called good and the thing called evil? Is there not actually only one thing, which is a mind that is inattentive? Surely, when there is complete attention, that is, when the mind is totally aware, alert, watchful, there is no such thing as evil or good; there is only an awakened state. Goodness then is not a quality, not a virtue, it is a state of love. When there is love, there is neither good nor bad, there is only love. When you really love somebody, you are not thinking of good or bad, your whole being is filled with that love. It is only when there is the cessation of complete attention, of love, that there comes the conflict between what I am and what I should be. Then that which I am is evil, and that which I should be is the so-called good.You watch your own mind and you will see that the moment the mind ceases to think in terms of becoming something, there is a cessation of action which is not stagnation; it is a state of total attention, which is goodness. 


- by J. Krishnamurti, The Book of Life


Thinking about these lines from Krishnaji.. "When the mind is totally aware" What does he calls mind here. The conscious one or the Un-conscious one or super conscious one. All lies within ourselves. That is the fact. But Human may often misunderstand this statement, that whatever mind is aware with alertness, then that will be an awakened state. 

God's Own Handwriting

Once Again I looked at What that poor baby girl, NIVASTHI wrote, It really looked like GOD'S OWN HANDWRITING telling me something.

GOD's OWN HANDWRITING... At least to me...

It is all about how recently I got an answer from the Eternal Father on what I have to do, while I am so confused about the purpose of my birth and existence even after too much of sufferings.

Being subjected to betrayals by my fellow beings, desperate and deserted was I. Only after a year or so I started moving outside. After a long time seeing that I walk again, little at least,  my parents wanted to take me to temples which they believed could solve my problems and improve my health. Though I don't have much belief in it, I agreed to take up the tour last Saturday to temples in Kumbakonam, South India to satisfy my parents.

We visited temple after temple puzzling me why people are searching for God somewhere else. But it is an off topic discussion. With my quest and lots of burdens in my mind I visited the temples but will sit near the gates of the temple, sometimes beneath trees if available inside that temple compound.

This happened in one such situation. I remember the place Vaitheeswaran Kovil, a temple in Tamilnadu. I along with my parents entered the temple and I sat as usual beneath a tree. The main reason is I can walk only a little. Not too much. Physically and Mentally I was totally out of my control. Thinking so much about the fake world I was sitting with many questions boggling my mind. What is my purpose here in this world? Who are real people ? Questions passed on like this.

I always use to have a notebook with me to write my thoughts. That day too I had it with me. Having the notebook in my hand I slowly sat down under a tree. I started opening the notebook and all of a sudden a small, a very little girl of age 3 or 4 jumped in asking to give her the notebook. I remember her too pretty innocent face. I gave her the notebook and asked her "Can you write dear?"

Where are we up to?

A news which is stirring the state.. I mean the country. A student stabbed teacher to death for she questioned about his studies and acted strictly. A news which confirmed what I was thinking about education currently is correct only. A news which confirmed about the current integrity of young generation and what they are up to and helpfully stating that my past posts were in no way wrong.

The so called Cultural Destitutes, I mean the Indians though having their own culture relying on somebody else's culture, once again proves they are nothing. The violent culture of killing which prevailed only in America, now in front of our eyes in my home town. 

Even I underwent a situation like this. When one of my student used the F*** word in front of other professors and not minding girls are still out there; which finally ended up in a mess of physical fight between me and him.

Real Things.. Really...

There is a conflict of understanding always. Realizing self and Others realizing us. Both are different. It is obvious that others won't really realize us in our true self. We can substitute the word understanding for the word realization.

I have seen and heard of many co-workers talking about traveling in flights for a tour, ordering a tour package abroad or for photography or for dating etc., Many I have seen traveling to their natives even by flights or other luxurious means. An AC Coach, First Class in Train etc., Convenience and Comfortability, they called it. We often talk about them and use to eye at them since we feel that is a boon given only to them.

Scene No. 1.

I am from a low middle class family, when I started my life, my father used to give me 500 INR for the whole month for expense. When I started earning it was 1750 INR. To travel to my native I had various options those days. Train and Bus. No flights to my native. Train i felt so costly. The cost is 179 INR. Again I have to catch up a bus to reach my native. I have to spend 50 INR more. Express bus service was too costly again. 106 INR it costed to reach my native. I used to get help of ordinary bus service which will cost me about 68 INR. I normally avoided going to my native often, though I wished I have to see my Parents and Grandfather.

Money is Something..but not everything

I often get surprised at people who fly for money making. Of course 95% of human are behind the printed paper. As one of my friend said those are the visiting cards of our identity. Strange truth. But at one point which I cannot agree is a person who is good at money making or wealth creation is only a successful person. Money is not a measuring gauge for a person's success. Often this world gets mixed up with wealth creation and success. The educational institutions teach that. The aim of educational process becomes money making. That's why we have in our world something called career oriented courses or professional courses.

My simple logical question is how many are truly successful in all their professional, personal and social attributes. Hands up please. Sometimes I have to pity all because there will be only few.

Bollywood Glam Queen(once) Manisha Koirala would be the current best example to explain this.(many more are there) Recent news about her family break up, addiction to alcohol, drugs etc., losing her physique etc., tells us Wealth alone is not a person's success, Not also a person's Glam and Fame. They can be key factors but not everything.

I know my co-workers who earned tens of thousands of bucks in their profession but still had personal problems. I know a tenant who lived downside my house who was a chartered accountant, who earned in sic figures in a month, had his son in asylum because that boys mental growth is not even for age 5 when he is reaching 17.

For Every End there will be a Beginning

Fasting continued for thirty days. I made it successful. Because I implemented the Ideas what I got from the cosmos. It is all about the passion what I had. It is all about what Eternal Father wanted to tell through me. A centre for those who fail and still want to succeed. Failures are only success delayed. Failures to whatever extent. Life always have new beginnings. The world have lots of things to explore. My duty in this world is not yet over. So I started this. After naming a series of blah-blah, I got a name from my experience itself.

Alpha at Omega. A Beginning in an Ending. Thought this would do. Now only thing I wanted is to have a place to implement it. I started a website too.

To along with my passion. Because What I needed were not a mere 1 out of 45. But many seekers from this whole world. I begin with my experiences of life itself. Take time to visit Alpha at Omega Website.