Duality - The act of Pretense in day to day life

Is it possible to work with honesty in our day to day life? With colleagues, with bosses, with relationship etc., If I pretend is it not like cheating oneself or GOD or Supreme Being himself. 

An interesting dialogue went on between me and my friend, later with couple of people at Krishnamurti Foundation India, in analyzing whether the honesty of proper "ME" is possible out of philosophy and whether it could be applied in our day to day life. I put forward the question as I am victim of that so called "Honesty and Duality".

I was honest to my students, when I taught, unlike that other technical jargonists, who knew nothing but making money and making fun of others. I was honest to my HOD and the college management, when others were just pretending. But later when I discovered, I was betrayed and condemned by these collective people called the "Society" - the bullish "society", this question arouse in me, whether it is possible to live with honesty in mind and still pretend as something else, more or less a hypocrite.



Though there is no solution derived, as it is an active dialogue session, a discussion, everybody insisted that there is no way of getting rid of this duality ie., the act of pretense in front of others, though whatever philosophy and religion teaches about the real honesty.

I remember the time I will tell to my students "Always true to be Your Self". I walked out and worked out only what I practiced in my life. Not like any other bullish creatures out there. Because I've seen them talking one or other way around in and in the absence of a particular person. I'm wondering whether the society really requires such persons.

If yes, then what for these so called philosophies and dominating dogmas, temples, churches, teachings, preachings etc., etc., Is it for deceiving the supreme self, GOD or else for deceiving himself/herself. In the act of pretense, aren't we deceiving ourselves.

Say for example we don't like a person or a group of persons really, but if we act or pretend that we belong to that group or I still is the friend of the person, then this act of pretense is beyond my honesty, beyond my mind, cheating my mind. It raises a question, am i true to my self or what I am going to gain in putting the others down or deceiving others. But this same thought has put me down and the others still stay healthy and wealthy.

Now my question is whether I have to follow this honesty or duality, to act honestly or with pretense, to deceive them and in turn myself and GOD. What exactly the so called society requires.

At one point of the dialogue there is one person who asked "If you want to be honest, how much you are ready to pay for it"


Though silence was there as my answer, I have already paid much. Isn't it? My losses financially about 40 lakh rupees in cash, the credit, my increased BP and other physical anomalies like left side weakness, mental troubles still which I can't get rid of, the frequent seizures which I still hold on.

Is that the reward of Honesty? So does it mean Duality is unavoidable to avoid such rewards?..............Wondering........