Failures and responsibility..

I am often asked or offered with a piece of advice from people that I made a mistake in life by taking some wrong kind of people to realize my ambition or start my company or whatever it is. And that I am the sole responsibility of my failures. To analyze this some facts:

• I chose people who belong to that field or who chose the field as their choice in life. After ensuring that is their career choice and passion only I selected them.(The bitter truth is some got job in some other sector or industry..life's choices or chaos?!)
• I am a strong believer of Stephen R.Covey's Win-Win Policy. I took them with a hope that I will realize my ambition in the same time they will take a step ahead in their career.
• The plan was to have a long time connection with the people I chose. For example, involving them in the ESOP plan if company goes public as well as profitable ie., a life time income for them with dividends.
• I have not seen them just as employees but more than that. So I was keen in developing their personal aspects too. I wanted to bring or make them find a leader in them.
• I was not a holder of big business stakes, but a person hoping for a better future as themselves. I started the company to earn a living as well as to realize my long time dream only. This I made them clear in the first day of opening my business itself. A 3 hour meeting or open talk you can call it.
• I wanted them to share my visions. So I always use to talk about that too and make them work for that.

Nothing of the above worked out, because of their ignorance.But really if one at least from that ten have done it right means, I would not have failed. At times when I am securing investments, let it be with other investors or else to my parents, I pronounced one sentence "I know them well and they know me well", The aspect in which I wrong and led to my failure. It is not the game of efficient management or something. It is a game of efficient "MAN" ment. Not as a business, but I wanted it as You win, I will also win with you. But now the question comes like. You failed, who is going to take up the responsibility. Mr. Covey you got any answer?

Liberal Family, Ignorant Education & Open Media - Path to Destruction

What the hell is happening in this world? Or atleast in India? Aren't we cultured? Does not our nation is famous for its own defined culture? Where do these demons come from? I am afraid to go out of the house nowadays, just only because I will hear something worst. I am afraid to open the news papers or watch TV only just because I will come to know something worst. I am afraid nowadays to login online even. Worst, Worst and Worst news everywhere. Especially of what is called as SEX. The damn devil is ruling almost everybody. Every silly individual. In these days more immorally. Continuously within few days I came across three different news in Yahoo, while I am checking my mail. I surfed them with heavy pain in MIND AND NOT TO SAY MY BODY IS ALMOST GONE.

NEWS 1 : Five Students Gang Raped a girl in CHENNAI, Tamilnadu.
NEWS 2 : 14 men Gang Raped two teenage girls in INDORE, MP Shot MMS
NEWS 3 : NOIDA teenager Gang-raped in a Car by four.


One common aspect I found in these three cases is this, the girls are well known or good friends for atleast two in each gang. Is it the fruitful benefit of the friendship? Or where we are mistaking. Aching all over the mind and body, as if these girls belong to my own family, or thinking in the position of the family members of those girls. What the hell is happening. It is intolerable. The problem is happening between two sexes, but the fact is the problem comes only to the girls. It is the common aspect all over the world, irrespective of it is America or Africa.

Society's Shameless Teachings

 “Man is by nature a social animal; an individual who is unsocial naturally and not accidentally is either beneath our notice or more than human. Society is something that precedes the individual. Anyone who either cannot lead the common life or is so self-sufficient as not to need to, and therefore does not partake of society, is either a beast or a god. ” 
                                                                                                                     ― Aristotle, Politics

There is no wonder in this saying. We human who just pretend to be mature are not mature enough actually. We take up and learn from things what happen in the society. Often our fingers point out the mistakes of what others are doing to justify our own mistakes. Apart from talking long philosophies, if we try to implement them in our day to day life we will ashamed as if we are nude in front of thousand others. But that too is not considered shame on these days. Reason, the saying above. But after all that application is only stressed by almost all religous dogmas of the world.

Development of technologies paves path for new kind of anomalies in human behaviour. When such anomalies increases in numbers and in more human minds, it becomes part of society's virtue. We name it as development of new generation. Human adapt to anomalies more than their self factor of life without conflicts. Plainly talking, there are increased number of immoral, un-ethical activities nowadays. When question arises as said above the fingers easily point out the society. "Everybody is like that, So am I", "There is nothing called wrong in this current society. We cannot live as per philosophies or religions", "I am so social or friendly that no one would regret my presence among them. I am so happy with it", an individual's statement would go on.

Conflict of the Opposites

A week before when an youngster asked this question to me "Anna, what in this world is Good and What is Bad?"

I quote here a saying by renowned philosopher J.Krishnamurthi to add more.


I wonder if there is such a thing as evil? Please give your attention, go with me, let us inquire together. We say there is good and evil. There is envy and love, and we say that envy is evil and love is good. Why do we divide life, calling this good and that bad, thereby creating the conflict of the opposites? Not that there is not envy, hate, brutality in the human mind and heart, an absence of compassion, love, but why do we divide life into the thing called good and the thing called evil? Is there not actually only one thing, which is a mind that is inattentive? Surely, when there is complete attention, that is, when the mind is totally aware, alert, watchful, there is no such thing as evil or good; there is only an awakened state. Goodness then is not a quality, not a virtue, it is a state of love. When there is love, there is neither good nor bad, there is only love. When you really love somebody, you are not thinking of good or bad, your whole being is filled with that love. It is only when there is the cessation of complete attention, of love, that there comes the conflict between what I am and what I should be. Then that which I am is evil, and that which I should be is the so-called good.You watch your own mind and you will see that the moment the mind ceases to think in terms of becoming something, there is a cessation of action which is not stagnation; it is a state of total attention, which is goodness. 


- by J. Krishnamurti, The Book of Life


Thinking about these lines from Krishnaji.. "When the mind is totally aware" What does he calls mind here. The conscious one or the Un-conscious one or super conscious one. All lies within ourselves. That is the fact. But Human may often misunderstand this statement, that whatever mind is aware with alertness, then that will be an awakened state. 

God's Own Handwriting

Once Again I looked at What that poor baby girl, NIVASTHI wrote, It really looked like GOD'S OWN HANDWRITING telling me something.

GOD's OWN HANDWRITING... At least to me...

It is all about how recently I got an answer from the Eternal Father on what I have to do, while I am so confused about the purpose of my birth and existence even after too much of sufferings.

Being subjected to betrayals by my fellow beings, desperate and deserted was I. Only after a year or so I started moving outside. After a long time seeing that I walk again, little at least,  my parents wanted to take me to temples which they believed could solve my problems and improve my health. Though I don't have much belief in it, I agreed to take up the tour last Saturday to temples in Kumbakonam, South India to satisfy my parents.

We visited temple after temple puzzling me why people are searching for God somewhere else. But it is an off topic discussion. With my quest and lots of burdens in my mind I visited the temples but will sit near the gates of the temple, sometimes beneath trees if available inside that temple compound.

This happened in one such situation. I remember the place Vaitheeswaran Kovil, a temple in Tamilnadu. I along with my parents entered the temple and I sat as usual beneath a tree. The main reason is I can walk only a little. Not too much. Physically and Mentally I was totally out of my control. Thinking so much about the fake world I was sitting with many questions boggling my mind. What is my purpose here in this world? Who are real people ? Questions passed on like this.

I always use to have a notebook with me to write my thoughts. That day too I had it with me. Having the notebook in my hand I slowly sat down under a tree. I started opening the notebook and all of a sudden a small, a very little girl of age 3 or 4 jumped in asking to give her the notebook. I remember her too pretty innocent face. I gave her the notebook and asked her "Can you write dear?"

Where are we up to?

A news which is stirring the state.. I mean the country. A student stabbed teacher to death for she questioned about his studies and acted strictly. A news which confirmed what I was thinking about education currently is correct only. A news which confirmed about the current integrity of young generation and what they are up to and helpfully stating that my past posts were in no way wrong.

The so called Cultural Destitutes, I mean the Indians though having their own culture relying on somebody else's culture, once again proves they are nothing. The violent culture of killing which prevailed only in America, now in front of our eyes in my home town. 

Even I underwent a situation like this. When one of my student used the F*** word in front of other professors and not minding girls are still out there; which finally ended up in a mess of physical fight between me and him.

Real Things.. Really...

There is a conflict of understanding always. Realizing self and Others realizing us. Both are different. It is obvious that others won't really realize us in our true self. We can substitute the word understanding for the word realization.

I have seen and heard of many co-workers talking about traveling in flights for a tour, ordering a tour package abroad or for photography or for dating etc., Many I have seen traveling to their natives even by flights or other luxurious means. An AC Coach, First Class in Train etc., Convenience and Comfortability, they called it. We often talk about them and use to eye at them since we feel that is a boon given only to them.

Scene No. 1.

I am from a low middle class family, when I started my life, my father used to give me 500 INR for the whole month for expense. When I started earning it was 1750 INR. To travel to my native I had various options those days. Train and Bus. No flights to my native. Train i felt so costly. The cost is 179 INR. Again I have to catch up a bus to reach my native. I have to spend 50 INR more. Express bus service was too costly again. 106 INR it costed to reach my native. I used to get help of ordinary bus service which will cost me about 68 INR. I normally avoided going to my native often, though I wished I have to see my Parents and Grandfather.